Friday, June 30, 2006
Blood Surf and Poisoned Arrows
Read more about Blood Surf, learn the theme song
and discover screenplay writer Roni Rokit here at Sorens Leap
The burn of getting cancelled from Smellrose Place has eased considerably in the past few weeks. I'm not consumed with anger towards V & K as before. Not that I've grown a silky pelt. Trust that there are a more than a few poison tipped verbal arrows ready to fly. But I don't have them cocked at the ready. Have stopped setting my sight on their targets.
Wednesday, June 28, 2006
Good to be here
"They're coming to cut our cable off, Mama" Mingus told me. It was a mercifully sunny Wednesday morning and I was waking up after an evening writing my first HTML/CSS codes which was very exciting (she's an uber geek! uber geek!). The knocking forced me to own the humiliation of the scene: I don't have the money to pay Comcast right now. Not at my current caloric intake.
I sat down at my desk and pretended not to watch the lime green lights of the cable modem. Mingus was bouncing around in the living room, watching outside of the far left window as the technician climbed the ladder to open the steel box that houses the building's fiber optics and began his search for our connection.
"It's going to be cut off right now." Mingus returned into my bedroom with a solemn realization that not only was the television gone, but now even his good luck forays into internet gaming were over until he moves to his Nani's next week.
Like that, the four lights blinked their last. We sighed. And sat. Five minutes later they returned, winking a furious "surf's up!" to computer addicted me!
We were overjoyed but quiet about it, scared that it was just a momentary cyber surge, about to end once the little man on the ladder discovered his error.
But, no. Walking into the living room, trying to be as nonchalant as we could, we saw his ladder still propped against the brick of our building. He was one of four men standing in a huddle in our front yard who soon carried the ladder back to a gray van, fixed it on the roof and drove off.
deep.dark.disco
Today I listened to the rough mixes of this album I've been working on with Fox since 2002. Since 1992 I've been working with Fox and collectively we've been calling ourselves Foxline Productions since Live, Nude & Uncensored first started broadcasting on Radio Panik in Brussels. The record's called deep.dark.disco and it's going to get a lot of asses shaking if we ever release it.
We keep getting together for a few months of each year, writing music & lyrics and recording hot vocals and then saying goodbye to one another at Dulles Airport. Lucky Fox, he gets to stay in Europe with the rest of the gang while I deal with the condom slick streets of SE.
I'm the one who invested almost $10K in equipment, not to mention a $30K loan to attend audio engineering school (which I'm about to resume in two weeks!). But I'm not the one to get to work mixing my own shit. I'd rather blog, snap photos, photoshop, learn HTML and CSS - especially these days. Something about it just isn't the same without Fox by my side....
Monday, June 26, 2006
Jane Power!
Jane arrived and it was pelting rain just like that morning last November when she left my house for Houston. She looks strong. Knowing. Filled out and up with some kind of new Jane power. She's found those bits of iron within that - I've heard told - put together form a strong spike. She's leaning on it though she continues to doubt herself - which I'ma help break her of !
Wednesday, June 21, 2006
Forecasht
Tuesday, June 20, 2006
Abra in Anacostia
Behold Abra, 85lbs of sinewy Artic Wolf. Warren's 1982 RV pulled up exactly at his announced noon arrival. Abra bounded into our house full of wild, nobel confidence and instantly began an amusing game of intimidation with Badness and Mr. Blake, who had the verve to scratch him on the nose. Abra just growl-talked in a deep, lupine basso as if to say "you're less than rarebit on a ritz".
Around 5:30 we all decided to remedy the beverage situation by walking to Tony's Country Market on the corner of U & 16th. Everyone was out on the block this evening, soaking in the summer weather, detailing cars, hustling and gossiping. Abra's presence brought instant reactions from the people we passed. " 'zat a Wolf, Main?" and Warren would introduce them to Abra. Some children at the house where that young man was murdered in March were bold enough to pet him, though a young g let us know to hold the dog back.
Saturday, June 17, 2006
Mixed Tears
3AM and I'm compiling the official soundtrack to this emotional breakdown. Headphones strapped on my head, music blaring, singing at the top of my lungs with tears streaming down my face and it all feels terribly good.
Maybe I am -- as Alex suggests -- bipolar. My capacity for great joy and deep sorrow seems to be a whole lot more more more than most of the people I know. On the other hand, after much reflection I am realizing I don't know anyone in the immediate area very well, so maybe that's just not true.
I miss my old friends. In particular I wish The Ladies of The Home For Wayward Girls could convene round yon stained brown fold out table in NW once again. Maybe I should call G. Nah, it was as one way a street as my relationship with W in terms of being listened to. And I need to be heard. I long to be heard.
Song Instead of a Kiss
Allanah Myles
Be Without You
Mary J. Blige
So Broken
Bjork
The Chain
Fleetwood Mac
Bring Me Some Water
Melissa Etheridge
Night Moves
Bob Seger
Never There
Cake
Karma
Alicia Keys
Obsession
Army of Lovers
Kissed by a Rose
Seal
Show Me the Meaning of Being Lonely
Backstreet Boys
We Belong Together
Mariah Carey
Time After Time
Tuck & Patti
Last Goodbye
Jeff Buckley
Weak
Skunk Anansie
Make Me Smile (come up and see me)
Duran Duran
Since U Been Gone
Kelly Clarkson
Seasons of Love
Rent (original Broadway soundtrack)
Moments of Pleasure
Kate Bush
A chicken pot pie to soothe a troubled soul.
Friday, June 16, 2006
Wabi Sabi
When I was 19 I couldn't stop staring at myself in the mirror. It was like I had discovered another country and wanted to immerse myself in it's culture full time. One night, driving through Brussels in the passenger seat of my mother's Nissan, I was lovingly gazing at my reflection in the window and was embarrassed out of my reverie to see a man in the car next to ours mimicking me.
The Japanese have a concept called wabi sabi, the recognition that beauty is ever changing and incomplete. It's been a long time since I've adored my own reflection. There isn't even a full length mirror in my apartment. My hair is graying and there are more lines on my forehead when I laugh - which is a lot. And little tiny crows feet spreading from the sides of my usually squinting eyes.
But my son tells me everyone at school thinks I'm his older sister. Which puffs me up for the short minute it takes me to realize we live in a community where there are a lot of grandmothers the same age as me.
Thursday, June 15, 2006
Pagan
If I had to explain my "type" it would be this: good looking men who love to draw. I married one (not pictured)...Actually I'm still married to one (that's another blog or perhaps a visit to the court). And the Pagan pictured above grafiteed his name all over my heart. When we were good no one had ever made me laugh so much. He has this really banal, earthy humor that isn't my usual cuppa but he tickled my funny bone with it. His talent is languishing under his insecurity and neglect, but that's not something I can help him with which is a damn shame because - as the list of my talented men goes - this one has a very keen eye. Beyond the Brooklyn bravado lies a gentle soul. And, like every Pisces I've loved before, he stole my heart and left me broken.
Yucky Leaf
My son found this leaf on the sidewalk at the corner of 18th and V. We were surprised to find that none of the trees on the street had similar leaves. Could this be a bad case of tree acne? Arbo-leprosy? We both agreed, it was yuck. Mingus couldn't help but squish the poor thing underfoot when I had finished taking the photos. No juicy squirts, just green paste. Blech. If anyone knows what kind of leaf this is, please email me.
Wednesday, June 14, 2006
First Day of Summer
My son has graduated from the 3rd grade which means today -- rainy, grey and chilly --- is the first day of summer.
I picked him up from school a little earlier than he expected me to because I wanted to see his class together for the last time, thank his teacher, etc., We ended up walking back home --- takes about an hour -- and he asked me to tell him stories about when I was in elementary school.
It was a nice way to start off the vacation. Naturally, when we arrived home and he realized the television was still on the fritz he complained of being "bored".
If you want to check out another interesting blogger, who happens to have been my best friend in the fifth grade (American International School, Dacca, Bangladesh), check out chartreuse velour's Lengths of Comfy Verdure in the side bar. She inspired me to get into this bloggin' game.
I picked him up from school a little earlier than he expected me to because I wanted to see his class together for the last time, thank his teacher, etc., We ended up walking back home --- takes about an hour -- and he asked me to tell him stories about when I was in elementary school.
It was a nice way to start off the vacation. Naturally, when we arrived home and he realized the television was still on the fritz he complained of being "bored".
If you want to check out another interesting blogger, who happens to have been my best friend in the fifth grade (American International School, Dacca, Bangladesh), check out chartreuse velour's Lengths of Comfy Verdure in the side bar. She inspired me to get into this bloggin' game.
Tuesday, June 13, 2006
His Secret Charms
Hedgehog
The Goddess of Love
The Goddess of Love = I came to chip away your heart of stone / I rang your doorbell but you weren't home / So If you're waiting for my next attack / you best surrender there's no holdin' back / No...Whoa....The Goddess of Love / I've waited patiently and taught you well / But still you choose to live in Hell / Don't break your head / The answers free / I'll help you navigate this mystery / Just take my hand / No....Whoa...The Goddess of Love / The demon's a whisper / And dragons are harmless / Your chariot's waiting / To take you to places / Imagined in your dreams / So Breathe...Harder / Just forget about all the times you cried / It's no use / Your future looks bright / Compassion Smashin' up against your walls / And you must heed the loving call / Bow Down Before The Goddess of Love! / Don't break your head / The answers are free, so free / A stone heart / Can be released / Just Bow Down to Me / Cos I can chip away your stone / Love Takes You To Places Imagined In Your Dreams..... (c 2006)
Yes, Iron Maiden fans, this is a club, dance version of Maiden's The Trouper. I've changed most of the verses and added my own melody to the bridges, but the "Whoa" and the first two lines are my bow to Bruce Dickinson's vocal magnitude! I haven't recorded the vocals yet, but I'll add a link to my website once I do.
Saturday, June 10, 2006
The Seer
The child saw everything. W used to tell me
all the time that he was "concerned about the boy". That
boy whose name he always seemed to forget.
Are you picking up your son? Is your kid with you this
weekend?
At the beginning he was playful and interested in my son's
games and questions. Hindsight kicks abundant ass.
I'll now face it: once W had Ma spread like sweet creamery butter
he didn't need to do the I'm practically a kid myself!
routine anymore.
Moral of this blog?
If I have to separate my family life from the man I share
my body and soul with I AM WITH THE WRONG MAN.
Just A Girl In A Haunted House
Next Time I'll Wear A Mylar Sleeve
Paris called at 12:14AM.
I'ma have to show you how hide that shit, girl. Don't you know most muthafuckahs couldn't draw a heart even if you gave 'em a piece of paper, a pen and a $50 check? Keep your head up and I'll holla at you tomorrow.
They say fools rush in. What I want to know is how they knew me in the first place. Why didn't they pay me a visit, sit me down, offer me a cuppa tea and then proceed to hammer it into my tender skull with blunt force? They seem to have an aerial view of the love terrain. Couldn't they throw down a phamplet or two to help this straggler out of the wilderness?
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